White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
