just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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