Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Randomize
