Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
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