Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Randomize
