That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
