She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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