How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
