All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
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