She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
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