She said her name was "party"
My hand turned me down
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
