Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
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