You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
