You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize
