I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize
