ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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