No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
i will never coherently bang her
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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