We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
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