I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
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