Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
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