it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Randomize
