what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I just blew my weed a kiss
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
