I am puke
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
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