He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Best friends brother. Beat that.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
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