at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
it glows. i had to have it.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Randomize
