All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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