real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
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