Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
