The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I am spending my child support on dildos
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
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