Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
