omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Who wears a wallet chain?!
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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