Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
