i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Randomize