Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Randomize
