Sry I called you an 8
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I fill condoms, not promises.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
