Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
Randomize
