Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
