Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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