you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
His hands were made for my vagina.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Randomize