We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Randomize