If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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