OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
