I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
