Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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