i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
You were trust falling into bushes
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
