thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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