even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
