ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
