I can't disclose who, but one time I called someone, they didn't pick up, and immediately texted back 'will call later, masturbating'
I thought that was really considerate
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Randomize