he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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