I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
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